Chapter 5

Courtesy: Key to a Happier World

-Dr. Norman Vincent Peale


Summary
Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, a minister and writer, is known for his inspiring writing on a variety of topics. This magazine article, “Courtesy: Key to a Happier World,” shows his conviction, or actual belief, that the world would be a better place if people were more polite to each other.
In the first half of the article, Dr. Peale categorizes the mechanisms of courtesy. In the second half, he gives three pieces of advice on how to improve one’s manners. Although his topic is a serious one, Dr. Peale writes about it simply, with down-to-earth examples and anecdotes to illustrate his points; he keeps his large, public audience in mind. As a Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In simpler words, it means you should treat others the way you want to be treated. In this article he refers to the Golden Rule, assuming his audience is familiar with it.
Dr. Peale lists the three components of courtesy and gives three tips to improve one’s manners. Justice, Empathy, and the Capacity to treat all people alike, are the three components of courtesy. And the ways to improve one’s manners are by practicing courtesy (concentrating in your performance and not letting other’s bad manners make you rude), thinking in a courteous way, and being able to accept courtesy.



Question answer
1.     Which of the three “basic ingredients” of courtesy makes the most sense to you?
Ans: The three basic ingredients are:
1.     Empathy
2.     A strong sense of justice
3.     The capacity to treat all people alike

2.     Every culture/ religion has its own golden rule that people try to live by. What is yours? How do people apply it?
Ans: The belief in the being of a God and the activities that are linked with the worship of them is called religion. Every religion has its own golden rules that people try to live by. My religion is Hindu which has also some unique rules that we find people try to live by.
Courtesy, politeness and respectable manners are the basic ingredients of our culture. We respect to our seniors and love to our juniors. We respect and welcome to our guests heartily since guests are supposed as God. Parents and teachers are highly respected and supposed as God. We think that our birth place is beloved than heaven. We help to the poor giving money or something. We don’t try to do bad or sinful works because we afraid of gods. There are many other golden rules in our culture.

Culture rules are shifted from one generation to another by following them. People spread on the rules in their life and make their life valuable. Our rules have really made us realistic (capable or useful). People apply these rules by following them in their day-to-day life.

3.     Do you agree with Dr. Peale that our lives would be happier if we all had better manners? Explain.
Ans: Sure, I agree with Dr. Peale that our lives would be better-off if we all had better manners. It is clear that a person can be happy when he/ she is politely and respectably behaved. Many things come under good manners. Respecting to seniors, loving to juniors, speaking politely, helping to the poor, not speaking false etc. are the examples of good manners. If we all have good manners, we will behave to others well and we shall be well behaved by others. When we behave to others with good manners, they are happy and we are also happy when we are behaved with good manners. In this way good manners bring happiness in the lives of everyone.
If we all have good manners, we shall not have negative attitudes and feelings. God manners will stop us to do any kinds of works and being cruel to others. Good manners will really create only positive attitudes in our mind. Good manners will also create the world of happiness and we will be the happy persons of that happy world but these all things are only possible when we all have good manners.

4.     Are there universal good manners? In other words, is there a core of good manners that polite people of all countries recognize? Or, are good manners different for each individual culture?
Ans: I cannot simply say that there are universal good manners. Manners mean the habits and customs of a specific group of people. Manners also refer the way that somebody behaves and speaks towards other people. Manners differ from culture to culture, religion to religion and country to country. We can see many examples that prove that there are not universal good manners. For example: Bride wears red clothes in marriage in Hindu religion which is supposed best but in Christianity, fiancée wears white dress. What a difference white dress suits for bride in Christianity while in Hindu religion a widow wears white dress.
Good manners are different rather than universal due to several cultural norms and values. The manner which is best in one culture, religion or country may be worst in another religion, culture or country. A hug or a kiss is supposed common in western culture but it is not accepted in our culture.
However, there are certain core good manners which people of all countries recognize. Such as to respect to the seniors, to love to the juniors, to welcome to the guests heartily, to speak politely, to respect and obey parents and teachers. In this way justice, politeness, empathy, honesty, faithful, to treat all people alike etc. are the core of good manners that polite people of all countries recognize.

5.     Writing Compound Sentences.
Form compound sentences by adding an independent clause (With a subject and verb).
a. Did they treat you courteously, or ……?
Ans: Did they treat you courteously, or were they rude to you?
b. The studens respect that teacher, for ……
Ans: The students respect that teacher, for she is always prepared for class.
c. I wanted to tell the truth, yet ……
Ans: I wanted to tell the truth, yet I was afraid of how you would react to it.
d. ……, so I told a white lie (untrue statement)
Ans: I was afraid of hurting my mother’s feeling, so I told a white lie.


e. ……, but I was suspicious of their motives.
Ans: They were eager to help me, but I was suspicious of their motives.
f. ……, and another is empathy.
Ans: Justice is one of the ingredient of good manners, and another is empathy.
g. ……, nor should you fail to return a person’s phone call.
Ans: To be polite in the USA, you shouldn’t fail to look at your interlocutor’s (person taking part in conversation with you) eyes, nor should you fail to return a person’s phone call.
h. ……, so their children will probably have very good manners.
Ans: My uncle and aunt have taught their children about good manners, so their children will probably have very good manners.
i. ……, for the thoughts in your mind determine the kind of person you are.
Ans: Be careful what you think of other people, for the thoughts in your mind determine the kind of person you are.
j. ……, nor is he very tactful.
Ans: He isn’t very thoughtful, nor is he very tactful.

6. Writing Complex Sentences.
Add an independent clause to each dependent clause to make a complex sentence.
a. …… even though John’s rude remark made me angry.
Ans: I didn’t react even though John’s rude remark made me angry.
b. …… since he lied to me last year.
Ans: I can’t trust Hari since he lied to me last year.
c. Whenever someone is rude to me, ……
Ans: Whenever someone is rude to me, I try not to be rude in return.
d. …… because he is considerate of others.
Ans: Hari gets along (to interact well) with people at work because he is considerate of others.
e. …… so that they will treat me courteously, too.
Ans: I always try to treat people courteously so that they will treat me courteously, too.
f. If a person’s bad manner bother you, ……
Ans: If a person’s bad manners bother you, it may be best just to tolerate the person’s bad manners.
g. Although I try to think in a courteous way, ……
Ans: Although I try to think in a courteous way, people sometimes blame me for not being courteous.
h..…… even when they are treated discourteously.
Ans: People with good manners respond politely even when they are treated discourteously.
i. If people practice courtesy, ……
Ans: If people practice courtesy, it will eventually become a habit.
j. Because Mr. Vann is suspicious of other’s motives, ……
Ans: Because Mr. Vann is suspicious of other’s motives, he can’t really accept their help.